If it doesn’t work… FIX IT!

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If all you want is a quick moodlifter, just read the title and take some initiative! There is probably something in your life that’s not working, and hasn’t been for a while, so do something about it! If you want more detailed information, or a personal example, keep reading.

Sounds like a no brainer, but how many of us are wandering around, doing and complaining about the same things over and over? WHY? Because we’ve been taught since we were 3 years old that this is how it is (even if it doesn’t work for you personally). We are moody and that’s okay because it’s “normal”. We take meds because we are depressed, even though there are side effects that makes life just as bad. That’s “normal”. We are unsuccessful at our jobs, but take no initiative to change it. We’re not supposed to love our jobs, we’re supposed to do what’s right, or make a paycheck. Here’s a personal example of things really not working for me:

I’ve been primarily a stay at home for 7 years. Almost every other week for 7 years I felt myself getting in the same “funk”. I’ve never wanted to leave my kids; I broke down when I did have to go back to work for a few weeks after having my first. I really couldn’t make it through the day without crying anytime someone asked about her. I just had to be home with her. I’ve always felt that pull stronger than the pull that makes me wanna work. But this mild depression that comes so often, I just knew it wasn’t anyway to live. It was making it hard to really enjoy and appreciate what I had as a stay at home mom (and I know so many people want that!). In the beginning, I tried “quick fixes”, like antidepressants (which I never stayed on for more than a few weeks because I couldn’t stand the side effects). Then I tried building my own businesses. I was successful at real estate, but became burnt out because it just wasn’t my passion, and it took so much evening and weekend time. I was successful at photography, and I still do that occasionally, but again, it was kind of a band-aid so that I could have my own thing. And trying to do all of these things from home with no childcare just wasn’t working. I still had to figure out babysitters on the fly because there was no set routine or hours. I didn’t get to dressed up, out of the house, and socialize with adults on a consistent basis, because again, appointments were primarily on the weekends and some evenings. Everything felt “makeshift”, which was just making matters worse.

Then I started meeting with a health coach. It was kind of pricey, but I thought to myself: every profession has some sort of continuing education to stay sharp, positive, and educated in their field. Why don’t people do more of this for themselves? To become better moms, wives, and just better people in general. I met with her once a week for 4 weeks, and although it wasn’t a 4 week miracle, it gave me a lot of insight into myself. It made me realize that just because I am blessed and fortunate to have to choice to stay home, it doesn’t mean it’s necessarily the right choice for me. Not full-time anyway. It made me realize how my mood and my nutrition go hand in hand. And it made me realize that my long-time interest in health and helping people is really my passion.

So, after 7 years of staying home and ultimately doing “the right thing” (and I really think it has been the right thing for my family overall), I have found what I feel like is a good fix. After searching long and hard, I have found my 2nd passion (family is still my first), which is helping other people figure things out, the way I have tried to do for myself. But there is more to this fix: I need to get out and away to work, even if it’s just part-time, so my husband has hired me to help with marketing at his company 3 days a week from 9-2. You don’t know how happy I am to get dressed, meet with adults, and do something productive. The bonus is that I get to not only market his business during these hours, I can also market my own personal ventures. The other bonus is that I get to pick my kids up from pre-k and school everyday, and then that time is THEIRS. We all win. Sometimes a “fix” doesn’t happen overnight, it takes some searching and some work on your part. But from big problems to little problems, if it’s not working, FIX IT (even if it seems like your problems are normal)!

All Moodiness, Tawny